It has been said, “Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.” But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. (Matthew 5:31, 32)
This is a challenging command. How could Jesus have been so radical? People do make mistakes in their choice of marriage partners, don't they? When you're young you do not always have wisdom in your choice of marriage partner, have you?
I've been thinking and praying about Jesus'words "except for marital unfaithfulness" and will first give some of my impressions. We tend to see marital unfaithfulness as having an affair with a third party. However, an abusive partner or one neglecting you physically and emotionally and who refuses to change is also unfaithful to their marriage vows. Therefore, if after you've done everything in your power to make the marriage work and having prayed much for help, the partner continues to make life unbearable for you, I guess divorce can be seen an acceptable option in God's eyes based upon the passage above.
If, however, you want to opt out for selfish reasons, or are too unconcerned to work out solvable problems through communication and changing of yourselves with the help of God and other professionals, divorce is not an option and it is to you that Jesus is talking.
How does God regard divorce?
I've been thinking and praying about Jesus'words "except for marital unfaithfulness" and will first give some of my impressions. We tend to see marital unfaithfulness as having an affair with a third party. However, an abusive partner or one neglecting you physically and emotionally and who refuses to change is also unfaithful to their marriage vows. Therefore, if after you've done everything in your power to make the marriage work and having prayed much for help, the partner continues to make life unbearable for you, I guess divorce can be seen an acceptable option in God's eyes based upon the passage above.
If, however, you want to opt out for selfish reasons, or are too unconcerned to work out solvable problems through communication and changing of yourselves with the help of God and other professionals, divorce is not an option and it is to you that Jesus is talking.
How does God regard divorce?
If anything is a serious issue to God, the devil makes serious effort to cause us to sin in that area. Have you ever wondered why divorce is so widespread?
How could Jesus, in His infinite love, put two people who seemingly made a mistake in a position like that? Why call a divorced woman an adulteress? Shouldn’t such people be forgiven and allowed to remarry? Many Christians believe this is the human thing to do, even if it is directly against Jesus’ commands.
We hear and read much about divorce. Many teachers talk about the feelings of the parties and practical aspects around them, about forgiveness and restoration after the divorce. Very few, however, seem to notice or consider important the second part of our passage, or maybe for the sake of convenience, they ignore it. “Whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.” Based on this instruction of Jesus divorce should be discouraged.
Why is marrying a divorced woman considered adultery? Jesus called such a woman an adulteress simply because sleeping with another man while her husband is alive is adultery in God's eyes. Anybody sleeping with another person outside of marriage is an adulterer/ess. She was chosen by God for another man. Why don’t people notice or obey it? Why do ministers marry divorced people left, right, and centre without blinking an eye?
Why is marrying a divorced woman considered adultery? Jesus called such a woman an adulteress simply because sleeping with another man while her husband is alive is adultery in God's eyes. Anybody sleeping with another person outside of marriage is an adulterer/ess. She was chosen by God for another man. Why don’t people notice or obey it? Why do ministers marry divorced people left, right, and centre without blinking an eye?
It is because most Christians have a humanistic worldview. As long as it does not damage the human body or another’s rights, it is okay.
However, the Great Commandment Jesus gave in Mark 12:30-31 has two legs on which it stands: (1) Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength,’” and (2) “and ‘Love your neighbour as yourself.’”
However, the Great Commandment Jesus gave in Mark 12:30-31 has two legs on which it stands: (1) Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength,’” and (2) “and ‘Love your neighbour as yourself.’”
Too few Christians are God-minded (considering His rights so to speak), loving the Lord their God with all their heart and with all their soul and with all their strength and with all their mind. Nathan challenged King David with an eye-opening statement. He confronted David concerning his adultery with Bathsheba and said the following in 2 Samuel 12:14: “But because by doing this you have made the enemies of the Lord show utter contempt, the son born to you will die.”
God forgave David and even blessed him. We know this because the heir to the throne was born from Bathsheba, an expression of God’s amazing love. But God got humiliated through his behaviour. Both God's human enemies and the evil spirits in the heavenly realms mocked God because of the behaviour of "the man after God's own heart". In Mark 12:30-31, much more emphasis is placed upon love for God than upon love for neighbours, like the song says: “It’s all about Jesus.”
Many Christians are too man-oriented and too little God-minded, doing what is acceptable to people rather than fearing God and obeying His commands. We tend to see things from a physical or carnal perspective instead of a spiritual perspective. When we disobey God’s commands, even though nobody sees us, there are still beings that see us: the evil spirits. We give them great occasion to blaspheme God, to laugh at Him. We cause God to be humiliated in the eyes of His enemies.
Whenever Jesus gave a command, He kept both God and man in mind, but especially the honour and glory of God. He is gracious and loving, but in order for us to live a life of blessing, it is better to obey (1 Samuel 15:22) and to believe and trust (Hebrews 11:6), because that pleases God. He is more than able to save a marriage if we trust Him. If a couple, therefore, divorces, the woman becomes an adulteress and if a man marries a divorced woman, he commits adultery according to Scripture. Disobeying this New Testament command brings dishonour to God before his enemies, even though it is acceptable to man, just like with any other act of disobedience. So what are we to do? To be continued.
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I understand what you are saying about divorce and adultery, but why is the woman blamed when it is the man who committed the adultery?
ReplyDeleteI only explained what the Lord Jesus meant. These words of His were not about committing adultery, but about divorce. I hope you read all the posts on this topic so you could get it in context. If a man in a marriage relationship commits adultery and the woman divorces him because of it, she will be exempt from this ruling of the Lord Jesus.
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